Trying to get by...

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Fall CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE ADULT LEARNIGN CENTER

Fall CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY Monday, October 2 , 2006 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM. Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM . Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. M eets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. Class 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? --- Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor --- Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. Class 5 After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM Class 6 Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM Class 7 Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum . Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. Class 8 Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturdays noon , 2 hours. Class 11 Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing . Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined Class 12 How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM . Class 13 How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 14 The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined. Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

6 comments:

zaid said...

since I'm eligible for one or few of your classes, would like you to direct me to your website, so i can enroll in the on line classes. otherwise don't be so optimstic of issuing handout of your diplomas any time soon, and goodluck :)

PALFORCE said...

LOL Zaid,

I got this from my wife and I thought its funny.

salam said...

can you please enroll my husband to class no seven before he drives me crazy?

PALFORCE said...

LOL,

I think all married men should go through the whole course if you asked me. Allah ye3enkom, I wonder how you women do it?
How do you take our **** and still love us through the years?!

Ha Ana Za said...

LOL! Another great post Palforce. I'm not married but I can identify all of the above in my brother, father and male friends and I thought it was just them!

kinzi said...

Khaled, this was great! I'm laughing TOO hard.

Maybe we should get your wife blogging?

One thing I appreciated that it wasn't a slam, but a tongue in cheek look at reality. They did forget the squeezing the toothpaste from the middle and putting the cap back, though. OOHHH, and my favorite, cleaning the white bits off the mirror after flossing.

I think men are great, and the way God made us to compliment and complete each other is nothing short of miraculous. He blesses us wives by taking away our sense of smell when the **** gets thick.